Posted by oldschool (anonymous) on May 13, 2008 at 11:36 p.m. (Suggest removal)

STUPID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

Posted by kpage (anonymous) on May 13, 2008 at 11:41 p.m.

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Posted by Peace007 (anonymous) on May 13, 2008 at 11:47 p.m. (Suggest removal)

I guess she and the inmate she was bringing the drugs to can holler at one another...hey baby, how's it going over there on your side of the jail? I hope they don't decide to marry while they're both incarcerated.

Is this an example of birds of a feather flocking together?

Posted by kpage (anonymous) on May 13, 2008 at 11:51 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Peace...it may be muskrat love.

Posted by oldschool (anonymous) on May 13, 2008 at 11:55 p.m. (Suggest removal)

peace and kpage yaw r 2 funny! lol Hey but if the truth hurts......OH WELL...haha

Posted by Peace007 (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 12:05 a.m. (Suggest removal)

LOL, kpage, now I'm trying to remember the words to that song. I couldn't remember, so I did the google:

Muskrat, muskrat candlelight
Doin' the town and doin' it right
In the evenin'
It's pretty pleasin'
Muskrat Susie, Muskrat Sam
Do the jitterbug out in muskrat land
And they shimmy
Sammy's so skinny
And they whirled and they twirled and they tangoed
Singin' and jingin' the jango
Floatin' like the heavens above
It looks like muskrat love
Nibbling on bacon, chewin' on cheese
Sammy says to Susie "Honey, would you please be my missus?"
Susie says yes with her kisses
And now he's ticklin' her fancy
Rubbin' her toes
Muzzle to muzzle, now anything goes
As they wriggle, and Sue starts to giggle
And they whirled and they twirled and they tangoed
Singin' and jingin' the jango
Floatin' like the heavens above
It looks like muskrat love
La da da da da ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lbh9c0noR...

Posted by NtzMom55 (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 2:06 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Well, since 'da lady' brought her man a bar of Irish Spring, their song shoud be "So Fresh, So Clean" by Outkast.

Posted by rattlesnake (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 5:56 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Maby she can get a job at the new prison handing out soap.

Posted by timnoklahoma (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 6:30 a.m. (Suggest removal)

The dollar bill is used to help roll a joint!!
Don't ask me how I know---I just heard from a FRIEND!

Posted by timnoklahoma (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 6:36 a.m. (Suggest removal)

I wonder if she even at least tried to glue the end of the box back down...or wet the soap and put it back together where it would dry and look whole again. If she had cut it straight, like with a razor, and then hollowed it out from the inside, put it back together and wet it down and rubbed it to where it would seal back together---it might have worked.
Oh well, live and learn!!!
If you go to jail---have your next of kin bring you a bar of "soap on a rope"---it is the BEST thing to have in there---haha!

Posted by rattlesnake (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 6:49 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Sounds like the voice of experience talking.

Posted by buttercup26 (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 7:04 a.m.

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Posted by timnoklahoma (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 7:07 a.m. (Suggest removal)

No, but I am related to several law enforcement officals and I hear a lot of the crazy stuff that is tried in jails and prisons. Also read several papers daily from here in Oklahoma. the USA Today, and several on the internet and they all for the most part have stupid crimanal stories in them.

Posted by lynnemfinger (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 7:16 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Jessica is my daughter, and my heart is breaking today. I did not raise her to do this type of stuff. We will not be trying to "get her out of this one". We will do whatever is necessary to make sure that she realizes what she has done. It will be "tough love". Society today is tough; we have MTV, filthy music, violent video games, porno, etc. I am asking all of you to have compassion and to pray for me.

Posted by supermom (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 7:25 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Mrs Emfinger,
Hopefully your daughter will learn from this mistake and can get her life straightened out. Prayers are with you.

Posted by lynnemfinger (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 7:37 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Thank you, supermom, for your comments. All of your posts show a kind spirit. I, too, hope this will be a lesson. I hope that all of her friends drop her, I hope that she will want to make something of her life, I hope that she will begin to read the Bible. I do know that this young man has been abusive toward her and she may have been afraid of him - I don't know for sure because she doesn't tell me much but I learned this from other people.

Posted by itsjustme (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 7:42 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Mrs. Emfinger, I am very sorry for you for what your daughter has done. I know how you are feeling. I have a son in the AC jail right now for drugs. This is not his first time and I can only pray it will be his last time. That is about all we can do is pray for them. I have tried to help him and talk to him about it, but untill he makes his mind up to stop, there is not much we can do. They key is to keep them away from the people they do it with. It's kinda hard for me to do that now, my son is now 24. The bad part is most of his is is his family and his own daddy. (we are divorced)
Hopefully Jessica will get herself straightend out very soon and realize this is not the kind of life she wants to live.

Posted by wifetoone (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 7:50 a.m. (Suggest removal)

the deal with the dollar bill is,to crush the pill and snort the Hydrocodone. I watch Intervention on tv, everybody should you can learn a lot. Or they can smoke it,Or do what ever they decide to do with it.

Posted by lynnemfinger (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 7:50 a.m. (Suggest removal)

When is that show on? I do not know much about drugs. I have always been known as a person who usually does the right thing.

Posted by wifetoone (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 7:58 a.m. (Suggest removal)

(lynnemfinger) It comes On A&E times and nights are different. Its a very good show its real and it gives you a whole new outlook on kids and adults on the things that they will do to their bodies. Watch it if you can.

Posted by wifetoone (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 8 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Go on A&E .com and it can tell you and show you some past cases.

Posted by Teach4Peace (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 8:12 a.m. (Suggest removal)

lynnemfinger, thanks for coming on and letting us read your plight. If I may, has this been an ongoing issue with your daughter, is it something that has progressed, this type of behavior. I think you could do a lot in presenting parents with "warning" signs, etc. I really hope this is the turning point for your daughter, that she understands, this is NOT the direction she is going to want her life to go in.

Posted by itsjustme (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 8:25 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Sometimes you don't see the warning signs, or "know" the warning signs. I didn't know them. I would find things in my son's room and not know what he was doing with it. Just little things like an ink pen taken apart and other little tubes made out of different things. I had no idea what he was doing with those things, I just thought he liked to take things apart. This has been about 9 years ago and I just recently learned what he was doing with those things from watching intervention and cops. I could have asked him why he was taking things apart, but I doubt very seriously that he would have told me he was using drugs with them.
There are some obvious signs, but watching intervention will help you to know what they are.

Posted by lynnemfinger (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 8:51 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Thank all of you for your postings. My children are the product of a broken home; their dad has never had much time for them. Each one chose a path to follow; one exceled by making honor roll, dancing, joining clubs, and recently graduated cum laude with a degree in Elementary Education. The other has acted out in order to get attention. Knowing my kids have come from a broken home makes me worry for the young women today who choose to have a baby without the dad being a part of the baby's life. Children need the validation of a dad. The suggestion of looking for the warning signs is good - I will think about the signs and then post it.

Posted by SIOUXLADY (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 8:58 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Lynn,, she is 19 years old.. young and has a full life ahead of her... Hopefully, she will take this situation and turn it around for the good... But you as a parent... you must put your foot down RIGHT NOW. Lay down the LAW..If she does not want ao abide by the law then she will not abide by your rules either... She is not stupid, she knows right from wrong... do not sugar coat anything that she has done wrong. Call it what it is.... A CRIME.. She should pay for what she has done wrong and choose to do the right things in her days ahead.
A LOT OF CHILDREN NEED TOUGH LOVE. We as parents, friends and family must do just that GIVE LOVE, BUT TOUGH LOVE hopefully will make them think about the wrongs they have done. Getting them out of things when they do wrong, does not help them at all, and it makes for HEARTACHES AND HEARTBREAKS FOR the ones that care about them most.

PRAY FOR HER MIND... THE DEVIL HAS GOTTEN IN CONTROL OF HER AND OTHER CHILDREN TOO.

Posted by lynnemfinger (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 9:02 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Secrecy is probably the main sign of someone who is doing wrong. They don't tell you anything and they get angry if you ask them where they're going (you're "tripping"). Jessica's main problem is low self esteem. She is very immature, she only weighs 115 pounds, and I certainly don't think of her as a "woman".

Posted by lynnemfinger (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 9:06 a.m. (Suggest removal)

You're right, siouxlady, I did not mean to sugar coat it. I have already cut off her cell phone, and she will not be allowed to drive. We will take her where she needs to go. I do not plan to get her out of anything. We plan on leaving her in jail for at least a week or two. It is hard to be the bad guy; it is not in my nature but I will be the world's meanest mother.

Posted by lynnemfinger (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 9:06 a.m. (Suggest removal)

My daughter learned her ways from her dad, so itsjustme is right. I am just so low right now that I can't think straight.

Posted by itsjustme (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 9:07 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Having a dad in their life is not always a good thing. My ex started using drugs and I didn't know it for a while. Then after I left him, I found out he was doing drugs with our son. I think at the time it was pot, but now they are doing much worse together. So just because theirs a dad in the picture, it's not always a good thing. I wish I would have left my kids dad right after I had my last child with him. Thank God I had only 2 with him. I beleive I could have done a lot better raising them on my own than with him in our lives. Thankfully I left before my daughter was a teenager. She turned out wonderful. I did later find out from her that when she would visit him on weekends, he let her drink and get drunk. I didn't know this untill she turned 18. Some men (and women) just are not fit to be parents.

Posted by lynnemfinger (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 9:36 a.m. (Suggest removal)

At least three times a week I hear stories from friends about what their kids are doing and how is it breaking their hearts. I do not know the answer. But your comments are a comfort.

Posted by rattlesnake (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 9:39 a.m. (Suggest removal)

on the other side of the coin it's not always good to have the mother in their live especially when the mother has a drinking and drug problem as was with the case with my daughters

Posted by itsjustme (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 9:49 a.m. (Suggest removal)

If Jessica is being abused by this guy, get her away from immediatly. He is no good, as you already know this. Please tell her that if he is mean to her and he hits her, he will not stop. It will only get worse. I know because I have been through all that too. I was with my ex for 20 years and it only got worse. Please try to get her to understand this. She is only 19 and he has already gotten her in jail. I know she did this on her own, but it was for him. If it wasn't for him, she wouldn't be there. There are plenty of good guys out there for her. Tell her not to waste her time or life on this guy.

Posted by itsjustme (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 9:51 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Yea rattlesnake, that's why I said some men (and women) just are not fit to be parents. I know of a few myself........

Posted by foxxy27 (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 10:15 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Lynn, I know you personally and you have tried everything in your power to keep Jess out of trouble keep doing the great job that you are doing, but press harder something is going to break. Kids today go through so much, we as adults sometime forget what it is like to be young. Yes going through a divorce can have a large impact on a person life trust me I know but the only thing that is and will work is Prayer and Talking. This might just be the breaking point for her. You don't have to explain yourself to anyone. because We as parent have to face a lot of things our kids do. and if you haven't had a life changing problem to happen with your child just pray that you won't.

Posted by Hardcorps (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 10:19 a.m. (Suggest removal)

lynnemfinger I hope things work out for you and your daughter. Sounds like you are on the right path. Keep it up.

Posted by lynnemfinger (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 10:49 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Thanks to all of you. May God bless you.

Posted by firered (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 11:15 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Lynn, Someone asked you earlier if this was an ongoing issue with your daugther. I didn't see where you had responded to that so I'd like to pose that question again. Did you know that she had this issue?

Posted by Teach4Peace (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 11:41 a.m. (Suggest removal)

When parenting is done by a stable minded man (father) and woman (mother), it is a beautiful thing. It is the best way to parent, in my opinion. I don't want to minimize the importance of having a father/husband in the home with the children, but women must be wise and not select just any man over their children. I would far rather a single, loving, hard working mother to got at it alone, than to see her with a total loser and jerk.

Posted by lynnemfinger (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 11:50 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Jessica has always been a challenge. I have always wondered if she were bi-polar. I took her to a counselor for a few times before she turned 18. I tried to get her to a counselor a few months ago but they would not take her because she was over 18 and I could not make the appointment - even though the cost was based on my income. The main problem is her wanting to follow the crowd for excitement. I keep looking back to see what signs I missed. I don't mean to completely blame her dad - I just am so low I cannot think.

Posted by babyblu2001 (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 12:15 p.m. (Suggest removal)

A great way for parents to keep up with their teenagers is to monitor their computer use. Although Jessica's myspace is set to private you can see her mood is set up to show: "high"...Best wishes and prayers to all the parents going through hard times with their children. Don't give up on them, continue to love and support them. And don't beat YOURSELF up over it! Just hang in there Ms. Emfinger...atleast she has had this wakeup call before something worse happened! God Bless!

Posted by firered (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 12:55 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Lynn please check your email.

Posted by trulyblessed (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 12:57 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Coming from a broken home is not always the reason children turn out the way they do or do the things that they do. Some people tend to use that as just an excuse for doing what they want do. My mom raised five children all by herself. Nobody's pefect, but I think my mom did a hell of job. We are all grown and have decent (legal) jobs. The only man she and her children had and needed was GOD. He is there when that so-called "dad" is nowhere to be found or decides to walk out on his responsibility. I know of people who came from broken homes and are doing extremely well. I know of people who had a parent addicted to drugs and they are successful as well. We, as women, need to be strong and not dependent upon a man who just might decide to walk out our lives and our children's lives, on any given day. We must continue to talk with and talk to our children. Let them know that we love them will be there when they need us. Teach them how to pray. Pray for them and with them. Prayer changes things. Teach them about the LORD and let them know that if they don't want to lean on man, lean on him.

Mrs. Emfinger, I do pray that your daughter will learn from her mistake, but most importantly, I pray that GOD will give you strength to carry on. When all else fails, TRY GOD.

Posted by froggie (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 1:33 p.m. (Suggest removal)

I have to disagree with needing two parents. My parents were divorced when I was young and my mother did a wonderful job raising my siblings and I. We couldn't have hand picked a better parent. She was tough on us as times, but it was for the best.
Lynn, you keep your chin up. It sounds like you are on the right track. Don't you ever think that YOU aren't enough for your children. Some children have the very best parents in the world and still go down the wrong path. Have faith and keep trying. Good luck!

Posted by vidalia1 (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 1:48 p.m. (Suggest removal)

First of all I commend you Emfinger for the courage of wanting the help and so many have given very wise advice.
Sometimes the answer depends on the persons involved.No matter what the answer always know the answer involves faith,prayer,belief, and a spirit of hope.I have seen successful persons come from homes where they were raised by
both parents, successful persons come from persons who did not even know where they they were born much less who their parents were.I know of children who had to take care of the family because the parents were too drugged out.The post by trulyblessed is very reflective of my feelings of this subject.Never give up on your child no matter what.Maybe family talks will help all involve.Be there..Always show you care.

Posted by fatherof4 (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 4:07 p.m. (Suggest removal)

quote- "My daughter learned her ways from her dad, so itsjustme is right. I am just so low right now that I can't think straight"

Isn't he a nurse or some type of caretaker? Does he deal or use drugs?

Posted by drawpaintsing (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 4:48 p.m.

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Posted by ntzmom (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 4:54 p.m. (Suggest removal)

I believe her father is an x-ray technician, I know the family , or knew the family when Jennifer, the other daughter was in high school.

Posted by firered (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 4:57 p.m. (Suggest removal)

I grew up with this family. Jennifer and I were friends. I do not ever remember her father using or dealing drugs, I'm pretty sure he does not. So there ya go for your speculations...

Posted by lynnemfinger (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 4:58 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Please leave Jennifer out of this. She is a cum laude graduate of college. Our hearts are broken, and we are under a tremendous amount of stress. I thank all of you for the kind comments. I'm signing off now.

Posted by Karma101 (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 5 p.m.

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Posted by drawpaintsing (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 5:07 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Please, excuse me for joking in my previous post, but I just couldn't help myself.

Lynnemfinger, I'm sure Jessica is sorry for what she did. People make mistakes, and no one is perfect. I'm think she will never do anything like that again. Children from Two-parent homes make mistakes just as children from single-parents homes. I just hope that the family stick by her side now, because she will need you.

Posted by Karma101 (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 5:10 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Ok so I was removed for a curse word. Here it goes again.
Just a few things.

First - Karma bites.

Second - Being raised in a single parent home is no excuse to act out. Jennifer is proof. Jessica is the sole person responsible for what she did. She chose to act out. She is responsible for her own actions.

Third - If a child is bailed out repeatedly by their parent(s), they come to expect it. Dont let the guilt trip get to you.

Posted by blessed_momma (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 5:15 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Ms.Emfinger,Look up! All you can do at this point is pray! Things could be worse although I know it doesnt seem that way at this moment. Truth is, she is alive. There is hope. Do not let Satan hold you down. Get up, hold your head up and pray. Allow God to lead and guide you to help your daughter. I will be praying for yall.

Posted by lynnemfinger (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 5:17 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Came back on (I think I'm obsessed!). No, being raised in a single parent home is no excuse to act out. Like I said earlier, I am so low right now that I am not thinking straight. I have grounded her, I have taken her to counseling, I have tried very many different things. I don't know what I have bailed her out of because the time she was sent to Youth Court for flipping somebody off, we saw to it that she attended every class and went to every therapy session. Also, bail has been set and I am not bailing her out yet. Going to wait a couple of weeks. Very hard to do but.....it's gotta be done. PRAY FOR ME.

Posted by lynnemfinger (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 5:18 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Thank you, blessed momma, thank you.

Posted by Karma101 (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 5:31 p.m. (Suggest removal)

I'm not necessarily implying that you have bailed her out previously.

I'm making the generic comment that if you bail her out and make this easy for her because mommy comes to the rescue, it wont have the effect that it should.

I'm young, close to Jessica's age, and I hate watching other people my age bailed out and things disappear. Thats not how we learn. We have to live through it, we have to experience it because mom and/or dad aren't always going to be around to take care of things.

Part of growing up is learning to deal with what you've done and to be responsible. We have to learn to think about what our actions can cost us. Experience is the best lesson.

I think this is a major learning experience for her, especially if you can manage to pull through and let her sit long enough to think about this and experience what sitting in jail feels like. Its only a city jail, but if the experience is bad enough, she won't want to go back and see what prisons are like. She needs to see what goes on in a jail and what people are like day in and day out to get that experience.

I hope, as much as it hurts, you can pull through and make her stay long enough to learn what this all will do to her.

Posted by happyjudy (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 6:08 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Ms. Lynn my prayers are with you and the rest of your family. I am a product of a split home. I was raised by a very loving Father. My dad was wonderful. after the divorce my mom went wild so i chose to move to my dads. He was the best example a child could ask for. He ruled with love and because we respected him we had no problem following his rules. I would not call it tough love because. even as an adult if i had a problem i could turn to him for leadership. I talk in past tense because i lost my dad to cancer on Mothers Day 2 years ago today. I saw all the post talking about good mothers i could not let it past without sYING Dads can be great too. All my parents children turned out just fine. Im a pastors wife here in Natchez.

Posted by blessed_momma (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 7:55 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Ms. Emfinger, you are so welcomed! The enemy of our soul only has as much power as WE give him! God gave you power as a mother to pray intercessory prayer for your child. Satan's job is to steal,divide and destroy. Find you a place in prayer and find strength and hope and deliverance in Jesus. God gave her to YOU not Satan. Satan has a tight grasp on her, but God can and will loosen the enemy's hands if you intervean for her. DO NOT be ashamed! Hold your head high! If you are a child of God, you are royalty in his eyes. HE is the ONLY one that matters! Our Pastor gave us a book for Mother's day.It is "God's Promises for Mother's". Here are a few scriptures that will help you. PRAY THE WORD! Watch God work. Psalm 107:20, Isaiah 40:8 II Timothy 1:13, Joshua 1:9 II Corinthians 4:8-10, Jeremiah32:27, Ephesians 6:11-14, Ephesians4:26-27, II Thessalonians 3:3, II Corinthians 10:4, Micah 7:8, Psalm 119:114. May you find peace, encouragment, power and direction in His holy word. God bless you!

Posted by drawpaintsing (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 9:41 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Lynnemfinger, I didn't know that the problems were that serious between you and your daughter, so forgive me for my silly joke. I can only imagine how it feels when you are doing all you can for your child, and it doesn't seem like you are getting anywhere. I can figure that you get a lot of criticism from people; but remember, no one knows your child more than you do. I have a hyperactive son, who is very very smart, and his teachers don't have the patience to deal with him. They have already labelled him as a problem. I had one to say that he had ADHD. I took him to therapy, and the therapist said that she didn't see any sign of it. The teacher later came back and said that she made a mistake. I refused to put him on medication that will not only slow him down physcially, but mentally as well. The older he gets, the better he gets. I can go on and on on how I have to deal people, but it sounds like your case is a lot different from mine.

Honestly, all I can say to you is to "Never let go of Gods hand, because he is carrying you and your daughter. The three of you are on a long journey, and the only way to get to its end is to have faith. Don't give up on your daughter. Your storm may be rough right now, but your rainbow will be beautiful."

Posted by concerned (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 10:05 p.m. (Suggest removal)

If she is bipolar then i would think that she would benefit in your home seeing a qualified dr. instead of jail, sitting around with ppl. filling her mind full fo stuff...i'd get her out asap. If shes not a bad person then she doesn't need to be in jail, look what kind of ppl. are there...they want young girls to ruin their lives by smuggling things into them. Just my opinion.

Posted by ntzmom (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 10:11 p.m. (Suggest removal)

I wouldn't bail her out just yet concerned. Let her sit in there till her little butt is humbled and seems to appreciate her mother.
Otherwise, she will end up in jail for something far worse one day. Just my oppinion.

Posted by hopefloats (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 10:21 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Wonder who she got the drugs from? IF she got them from friends then there is most of your trouble.

Posted by irishspring (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 10:30 p.m. (Suggest removal)

"IF she got them from friends then there is most of your trouble."

Of course she did.

If you allow your kid to run with a rough crowd, what do you expect?

My mom would have killed me WAY before we got to this point.

If I were a 19 year old girl, delivering ANYTHING to my boyfriend...who was in JAIL, my parents would have been a bit suspicious of what I was doing with my free time.

Posted by bear30 (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 10:56 p.m. (Suggest removal)

My prayers are with you lynnemfinger. Stay strong & don't bail her out early. I know that it is hard to do, but you will be glad you did later. Hopefully she will learn from this & turn her life around. My prayers & thoughts are with you. God bless you.

Posted by BOBCAT1974 (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 11:06 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Lynne,wouldn't it be awesom if we all had manuals on how to raise our children.I think everyone that i know, that have kids,have been through rough times with their kids at one time are another.My family and close friends used to get mad at me for calling the law on my boys.Even if i suspected that trouble was brewing.My oldest tells me all the time that if we hadn't done this he would be dead by now.So many times i called on Randy Freeman,Bill Mcdaniel,Billy Kneely or Buddy Franks for their help.Just to know that they were their if my family needed them.I appreciate them with all of my being for always being their.God tells us if we teach them and bring them up in his love that if they stray that he will bring them back in his foll.So many times i worried and prayed,God answered those prayers,today they are both married and have children.Both are faithful in church.Also the oldest who delt us the most trouble in his teens,i would tell him that he would one day get all this back at him in a double dose.He and his wife have 6 children,they will all be teenagers at the same time.My prayers for him is that he hang in their raise them in Gods Love and just be there for them through thick and thin.Lynne,i just want you to know that a childs first love is their Mother.I was once told that a Mothers prayers are stronger than any other prayer.I beleive this with all my heart.My prayers are with you and you're family.

Posted by Peace007 (anonymous) on May 14, 2008 at 11:37 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Lynne, If Jessica hasn't ever been in jail before this, I hope you know that those collect calls from jail are very expensive. If I were you, I wouldn't accept them. I would write her a letter and explain why I wouldn't accept the calls, and send her a stamped self addressed envelope and a sheet of paper. Also, in the letter, I would tell her that when she got ready to go into an inpatient facility for help, I would consider getting her out of jail. I heard there was a good treatment center around Brookhaven or McComb. But first thing, I would do is find an Alanon group to join for support. I know there are several of those around Natchez and Vidalia. Those folks have been through it already and can give you good advice which will help you to hold your head up and find the strength to do what you are gonna need to do for Jessica.

I agree that you should pray. Pray for God to surround her with his holy angels, and ask for them to minister to her, and guide her in the right direction. Pray and ask for peace in your own heart. God loves you and Jessica. He became human just so he could experience birth, life, temptation, and death...in order to better understand his favorite creation. While you can't always depend on man, you can depend on God. Reach out to God and tell him that you need a miracle and then trust him to provide that miracle for you and your daughter.

Posted by irishspring (anonymous) on May 15, 2008 at 12:09 a.m. (Suggest removal)

ugh.

alchoholics anonymous? are you kidding? the kid snuck pot into a jail for her boyfriend...what does that have to do with alchohol or drug ADDICTION? did the article mention that she was addicted to any drugs? NO - maybe the boyfriend needs AA, but im betting parchman would be his best alternative.

Im betting that 90% or more of you posting here did not even know that someone with the last name emfinger lived in natchez before today. and now you are all spewing your opinions on what she should/shouldnt do with HER child.

everyone wants to quote the bible to lynn, and tell her how they raise their perfect little angels when they dont know any more about her or jessica than the words in an article i could write on the palm of my hand.

jessica is no addict, she just needs lynn to step up to the plate as a mother, and the two of them work through this.

alchoholics anonymous....wow, we have officially jumped the shark.

Posted by ntzmom (anonymous) on May 15, 2008 at 12:24 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Irish spring, I know the Emfingers, I know that several of us on here do.
But even the ones who don't know her, they ALL HAVE KIDS or atleast know the stunts they themselves pulled as kids and all anyone is trying to do is to be supportive and offer help.
Geeze, cut people a break.

Posted by Peace007 (anonymous) on May 15, 2008 at 12:46 a.m. (Suggest removal)

irishspring, Al-Anon is a support group for family members of addicts/alcoholics...just thought you should know. They help family members deal with their own feelings of guilt and give them guidance tips in what to expect. They explain to them about addictions in order to help them understand the addict. They will more than likely explain that addiction can happen in any family with or without two parents living together in the home; in good families, and in disfunctional families. You might be surprised who all could become addicted and even without illegal drugs. It's not always the child, sometimes it's the parent that becomes an addict. Sometimes, the child is the one who needs to attend Al-Anon to get support on how to deal with their parent. I know several people who go to Al-Anon and several who go to Alcoholics Anonymous. Both of those programs have been a life saver to many. Sometimes it helps just knowing that someone else has been through what you're going through and knows how you feel.

Actually, I don't know those Emfingers, but I did know there were some Emfingers living in Natchez and I have known some in the past.

Posted by lynnemfinger (anonymous) on May 15, 2008 at 7:10 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Thanks, everybody, for your support. With all of this happening, I have thought about Al-Anon and wondered if it would help me deal with this. Jessica, too, was always labeled by teachers - maybe the signs were always there and being a mother I could not step back and see. Her dad is not a bad person - when I said she learned from him, I did not mean doing bad things - I just meant not thinking about the outcome of things we do. And maybe I was too easy-going to raise a strong-willed child. I do not know the people Jessica hangs with; she did not bring her friends home. Sometimes we hide our heads in the sand and hope it's a phase. Hopefully, she and I can both learn from this.

Posted by Dvotdtohm (anonymous) on May 15, 2008 at 9:57 a.m. (Suggest removal)

After careful thought and reading what others wrote, I felt a need to throw in my two cents worth. Lynn is a wonderful person and has tried hard to raise two good girls. I saw her right after her daughter had graduated from college. She was and IS very proud of her. Now she is dealing with such crushed emotions they don't even have an actual title yet. Depressed, heartbroken, sad, worried, and the list goes on and on, and it will continue for a while until this all gets sorted out with the law, court, etc. So she needs people to be supportive. When she wants to talk, I have a door open, or a phone ready. Sometimes we need to distance ourselves for a while to get the right perspective. This time is now for her and Jessica. Both will have a bit of time to sort thru all of this and decide on the best courses of action for all involved.
Jessica had just started a new job and Lynn was so happy for her and proud for her. It has not been a daughter getting ALL of the attention and the other getting none. Our kids get to a certain age and the fork in the road is there, right in front of them. The direction they take is their own decision, choice. That I know of, Jessica does not do drugs, but has been influenced by this boyfriend in ways that are not positive, obviously. It has been an abusive relationship that I think Lynn thought was over, but secretly , it evidently was not. I know that Lynn will have prayers from many and they will be needed for many days to come. And hopefully, Jessica will be learning one of life's lessons and won't be repeating it.

Posted by firered (anonymous) on May 15, 2008 at 9:59 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Ms. Lynn I think that you should also look into Narcotics Anonymous (NA). I have heard wonderful things about their program. It will help Jessica as well as you. They do the family support thing as well. Just a thought!

Posted by blessed_momma (anonymous) on May 15, 2008 at 10:21 a.m. (Suggest removal)

irishspring, I would like to start by saying that I am not trying to be disrespectful or judgemental of you. I read your post several times. I think that you jumped to conclusions that people on this post are trying to tell Ms.Emfinger how to raise her child. That is NOT what we are doing at all. We are simply offering encouragment and support. You said ; quote " everyone wants to quote the bible to lynn, and tell her how they raise their perfect little angels when they dont know any more about her or jessica than the words in an article i could write on the palm of my hand".
NOONE ever claimed to have perfect angels. As for quoting the Bible to "Ms.Emfinger" ( I was taught to show respect) God is our comforter, our protector, our fortress, our high tower, our anchor, our strength, our provider, HE is the only answer. He is the way, the truth, and the light. Ms.Emfinger is seeking strength and guidance and direction for her situation. God is the only one that can help her. I dont know Ms.Emfinger personally, but I'm sure that she IS stepping up to the plate as a mother. She is doing what she feels is right. Thats all anyone can do. On your previous post ;quote"IF she got them from friends then there is most of your trouble."
Of course she did.
If you allow your kid to run with a rough crowd, what do you expect?
My mom would have killed me WAY before we got to this point.
If I were a 19 year old girl, delivering ANYTHING to my boyfriend...who was in JAIL, my parents would have been a bit suspicious of what I was doing with my free time".
You seem to be BLAMING Ms.Emfinger for her daughter's mistake. She is 19 years old. She is not a baby anymore. Her mother cannot keep track of her EVRY move. She can however, pray God's protection on her child.
irishspring, I pray that I havent offended you. I do not post to offend anyone. I post to give my opinion(we are all entitled to an opinion) and to offer encouragment. I mean no disrespect.

Posted by Peace007 (anonymous) on May 15, 2008 at 10:55 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Jessica may not be using drugs at all, I wouldn't know, but taking drugs to someone in jail at least suggests that she may be an enabler and easily influenced.

My suggestion of Al-Anon was for Lynne, which I believed would help her to deal with her own feelings, because she stated several times in the above comments that she is feeling low. I believe that being around other people who have gone through the same type of problem would help Lynne and perhaps eventually even Jessica.

Posted by Peace007 (anonymous) on May 15, 2008 at 11:37 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Years ago, I knew a grown woman in Pascagoula, MS, a mother of 3 children, who did the very same thing...she attempted to sneak marajuana into jail to her own son. She too got caught. She was arrested and sentenced to serve time in prison. I can't remember just how long she served, but it was her first offense. Jessica could be in very serious trouble.

Posted by irishspring (anonymous) on May 15, 2008 at 10:38 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Blessed -

Thanks for being so polite in your difference of opinion. I will, in turn, do the same.

I stand by what I said, and I leave my blame where it was. And I understand that "Ms. Emfinger" is much more respectable, but I know her personally...and we use each others first name

Posted by Fedup (anonymous) on May 16, 2008 at 10:18 a.m.

(This comment was removed by the site staff.)

Posted by windjammer (anonymous) on May 16, 2008 at 11:41 a.m. (Suggest removal)

I am an extended family member and I don't seem to be suffering as Fedup seems to think. Jessica has made some bad choices and with the love and support of Lynn and her (extended family) we will all do our best to help her get back on the right road in life. No one is perfect. We love Jessica just as I hope you love your family. I do appreciate those of you offering support for Lynn and Jessica. I hope Fedup, somewhere in your heart you can find some room to stop judging and say a prayer for Jessica and Lynn. Seems like in another comment I read, that you wrote about the hospital, you were very negative. I have a lot of friends there too, that need all the prayers and support they can get.

Posted by riverrat (anonymous) on May 16, 2008 at 12:35 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Fedup,
Judging from your truly classless post above, you have shown what real trash is. From one of Lynn's "extended family", keep your comments to yourself.