Charlie Brown once said, “It’s not the world that bothers me, it’s the people in it!”

I’ve become so frustrated with people that I’ve wanted to just pack up, say “good-bye” to everyone I know and escape to a deserted island. I watched Tom Hanks in “Castaway” and changed my mind. A volleyball is a poor substitute for people who really matter to you. I admit I would miss my family, my friends, my church — and the restaurants downtown.

One thing I’ve learned about living with others; relationships are always messy! There just isn’t any way around that fact. There are no perfect people, including you and me. Even among faithful and committed followers of Christ, perfection is elusive. A guy told his friend that he was looking for the perfect church to join. His friend said, “If you find it, please don’t join it. It will no longer be a perfect church!”

You will not go through life without offending someone, or being offended. Sadly, in moments of weakness, we disappoint those we love the most, as this poem points out:

There’s one sad truth in life I’ve found

While journeying east and west —

The only folks we really wound

Are those we love the best.

We flatter those we scarcely know,

We please the fleeting guest,

And deal full many a thoughtless blow

To those who love us best.

– Ella Wheeler Wilcox

Healthy relationships cannot be maintained without mistakes being made. In a recent survey of people who apologize, 20 percent start with “I’m sorry,” 30 percent start with “Forgive me,” and 50 percent with “You go first.” If you stay in relationship with others, you must develop a spirit of humility and practice forgiveness.

In the New Testament, Paul learned that getting along with people, even in the church, was worth the effort. “Work at living in peace with everyone and work at living a holy life, for those who are not holy will not see the Lord. Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many” (Hebrews 12:14-15 NLT). Paul found that developing relationships paid off for him during his imprisonment. In return, he gave us much of the New Testament. We all need to roll up our sleeves and determine to wade through messy relationships to reach wholeness.

Del loy is founding pastor of Crosspoint Church in Natchez