NATCHEZ &045; As a military wife for seven-and-a-half years, Beverly Merrill has been through all this before &045; the waiting, the wondering, making it on one’s own.

That doesn’t mean, however, that she doesn’t need some help to get through it again.

Beverly’s husband Ron, a Coast Guard reservist and chief petty officer, was called to active duty on Jan. 27 and is now stationed in Port Arthur, Texas.

&uot;He was in the Coast Guard for 24 years, and at age 48 he was called up,&uot; Beverly said.

&uot;Three times in the last year&uot; Ron was notified that activation was thought to be imminent, Beverly said. &uot;The third time was the charm.&uot;

Not that Beverly is unfamiliar with what being a military wife entails. She remembers well living in Germany as her first husband trained in Alabama.

&uot;If you’ve never been independent before, it can be difficult&uot; while your spouse is away, Beverly said.

Rule No. 1: Learn how to do the everyday things, such as changing your car’s oil, for yourself.

Rule No. 2 &045; always carry your Berlitz German for Travelers book with you &045; doesn’t apply in the Miss-Lou, Beverly admitted.

But rule No. 3 stands as Beverly’s most important advice to those dealing with a military spouse’s departure for the first time: don’t be afraid or ashamed to ask for help.

Take Beverly herself as an example. She has taken a disability leave from work and finds it difficult to do many tasks around the home by herself.

In addition to not having the daily support and companionship a spouse brings, having Ron gone &uot;means not having a person to change the light bulb, to take out the trash twice a week.&uot;

It means that she must balance the household finances &045; and find ways to deal with her husband’s $10,000 pay cut. Ron’s regular job is with the Natchez National Historical Park.

It means that she must find someone to help her with the yard work, too. But that’s the point, she added &045; that she has learned to reach out for help.

Next, Beverly would like to see those who are looking for ways to support the military start a network of those willing to handle such home tasks for military spouses.

&uot;There may be something out there already,&uot; Beverly said. &uot;I just don’t know about it.&uot;