Death isn’t something Americans like to face.

But along the highways, country roads and city streets death is there.

Death can come in the form of a single plastic flower taped to a light pole, a shoddily constructed wooden cross or a state-approved plaque.

You drive by it every day. And keep driving.

But someone didn’t keep driving. Someone died tragically, leaving loving family members behind.

This is the first in a series highlighting roadside memorials in the Miss-Lou, the tragedies that caused them, the people they represent and the families and friends who created them.

For those family members, roadside memorials can be a part of the grieving process.

Therapist Joe Swoveland of Swoveland and Simons Family Therapists in Natchez said outward displays could fall into any one of the stages of grief.

“One of the things that putting something up does is act kind of as a physical symbol that, to some degree, helps us stay connected,” Swoveland said.

“In our society we want to be able to touch something. Death is not a physical existence. So anything that anybody does as far as some type of symbol is a physical something they can still see.”

Louisiana State Trooper Mark Davis of Vidalia has worked the scene of somewhere between 10 and 15 fatal traffic accidents, he said.

The site of the first fatality he responded to is on the way to his troop office in Alexandria, La. It is marked with a memorial.

“The lady that was killed from that crash didn’t live far from me,” he said. “I knew a lot of her family and friends. She’d just become engaged.”

Now Davis thinks of that crash each time he passes.

The effect the memorial has on Davis and others can be another main reason the family created it, Swoveland said.

“Different people do it for different reasons, but for some, it’s not about honoring the person who is dead, but saying, ‘be aware, be careful as you drive,’” he said.

Part of Davis’ job as a trooper means meeting with family members, answering their questions and trying to guide them through the first few days after the accident.

“Families may travel that highway every day,” Davis said. “That spot is a bitter spot. They’ll always be linked to that spot on the highway.

“To the rest of us, you pass them every day and you may see them, but we are going on about our daily lives.”

When families can take their response to the initial grief and turn it outward, true healing has begun, professional counselor Logan Foley said.

Though there’s nothing wrong with having roadside memorials for purely selfish reasons, hoping they bring awareness is a stage of grief, he said.

“When people are looking to make something positive out of a negative situation, that’s a healthy way to deal with it,” Foley said.

Davis said he’s seen this stage frequently.

“In a way they want other people to look and say ‘hey, someone’s been killed here,’” he said. “Maybe it’ll make them drive a little better, make them say ‘I’m going to fast, I need to slow down.’ They don’t want another family to go through the grief.”

In small communities such as the ones that make up the Miss-Lou, many residents know the stories behind roadside memorials. And even the police officers working the crash can be deeply affected by the tragedy, Natchez Police Chief Mike Mullins said.

Mullins can’t remember the number of fatal accidents he’s worked, but he remembers the senselessness of many.

“The ones that involve young people are just so traumatic,” he said. “If things had been just slightly different it wouldn’t have happened.

“It’s hard to have the feeling that that’s someone else because we are in a small community and it does affect you.”

Shock, denial, sadness, depression, anger, bargaining and acceptance, they are all stages of grief, Swoveland said. They can come in different orders and they can repeat themselves. For some folks one stage lasts minutes, others years.

When the outward symbols of remembrance go up it doesn’t mean the grieving is over, he said. It just means that the family has accepted that the person is gone.

At that point, the death becomes real to every passerby. And everyone has to face it.

“A lot of times people don’t like to talk about death,” Swoveland said. “It’s just too much reality. We have to say, ‘here’s where someone was obviously tragically killed.’”

But the passersby keep driving.