Five months into my new role as father of two, I’m convinced each child’s mission is to teach me important — and very different — lessons.

That’s not the way I thought parenthood would be, though. From the outside looking in five years ago, it was daunting for sure, but seemingly a one-way street of education.

As the Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young song goes, we’re supposed to, “Teach your children well.”

Children are not, I ignorantly thought at first, supposed to be the teachers.

But make no mistake, I’m in school and at times Anna and James are good teachers.

Please don’t mistake that for our allowing them to do whatever they’d like, whenever they’d like.

That’s not the case. Their lessons are far less overt.

Almost from the beginning Anna was a little more on edge and a little more prone to become upset by surprises.

She couldn’t have been more than 6 months old when this was illustrated clearly.

My wife Julie and I were walking on the bluff, and Anna was riding in her stroller. Everything was great until we stopped to talk to a long-time acquaintance.

The person popped their head down at stroller level to say hello to Anna, who promptly belted out a shriek.

What we believed at first was merely a dislike for strangers — which I’m generally OK with — turned out to be less about strangers and more about simply not liking things not in her playbook.

Over time that’s proven to require much in the way of patience on our part. She can be headstrong, proving acorns and trees usually stick together.

I jokingly say she takes after Julie in this regard, but the truth is, she’s both of us, squared.

Those lessons of patience will, I’m certain, continue to deepen over time.

She is, as the relationship book suggests, from Venus, complex and fragile at times, tough at others, but each layer requiring patience to understand and guide.

On the other end of the spectrum, her little brother is definitely from Mars.

He is rarely fazed by much, beyond unexpected loud noises that temporarily shake him to the core.

While, he’s still quite young, he already possesses a relaxed, no-stress approach on life.

In short, he’s pretty much the polar opposite of his sister, who can be an overly cautious, worrier who doesn’t like things that don’t go her way.

James’s way is much more “mind like water” than his older sister.

He rarely gets upset or seemingly worried about anything. Instead he simply seems to be in a constant state of relaxation, observing the world around him.

When I look at him, I realize, God blessed us with him because He wanted us to learn to relax. While Anna may force us to slow down and be patient sometimes, James reminds us that nothing in the world aside from family is worth worrying about. Just take the world in stride he seems to say with his actions.

How we manage to guide these two vastly different personalities into becoming good, productive grown-ups will certainly be a challenge and a unique blessing that is revealed to us — I hope — as we go through our lives together.

I realize this is a journey that will change course along the way. Just when we think we know where we’re going, their personalities may change.

I’m reminded constantly to have a sense of humor, a healthy dose of patience and realize time is passing by faster and faster each day. From that, I’m reminded that we must enjoy each minute together.

Hopefully, as the years go by I can live out another lyric from the Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young song, “So just look at them and sigh, and know they love you.”
Kevin Cooper is publisher of The Natchez Democrat. He can be reached at 601-445-3539 or kevin.cooper@natchezdemocrat.com.